Published on April 20, 2025
We reveal Canada's priciest political theatre: the House of Commons. Now, brace yourself as we scale the dizzying heights of the Payroll Pyramid to find out exactly whoâs cashing in.
Prepare yourselves. Spreadsheets are coming.
Exhibit A: The Big Wigs and Their Price Tags
According to official disclosures covering Q2 2021 to Q2 2025,[1] the biggest spenders include:
- Justin Trudeau: $13.4 million (mostly salaries and consulting contracts).
- Pierre Poilievre: $9.5 million (mostly air miles, hospitality, and those mysterious consultants).
- Jagmeet Singh: $6.4 million (well-rounded but far from cheap).
Combined, these three accounted for over $29 million in expenses. A moment of silence for our dear taxpayer wallets.
Staff, Snacks, and Surprise Invoices
Wondering what your millions bought? Mostly people:
- Trudeauâs staffing: $12.2 million (the man loves a well-staffed meeting).
- Poilievreâs staffing: $7.5 million (possibly includes motivational cheerleaders).
- Singh's staffing: $5.3 million (solidly moderate, like his coffee choices).
Now, let's talk about those juicy extras:
- Travel: Poilievre ($857K), Singh ($449K), Trudeau (a surprisingly modest $10K. Does he teleport?).
- Consultants: Poilievre takes gold with $1.7 million, Trudeau close behind with $1.1 million, Singh rounds out at $764K. Who exactly are these shadowy figures? Stay tuned.
- Hospitality: Poilievreâs $122K likely funded endless strategy brunches, while Singh ($52K) opted for smaller muffins. Trudeau? Virtually zero. Did anyone invite him?
The Role of Roles: Who Costs the Most?
Top pricey parliamentary roles:
- Leader, Official Opposition (mostly Poilievre and previously OâToole)
- Prime Minister (Trudeau, obviously)
- National Caucus Research Offices (where facts go to get expensive makeovers)
These roles come with teams, offices, endless coffee runs, and travel that rivals a rock star tour.
Plot Twist Alert: Conservatives Outspend Everyone
Surprise, surprise! Despite their constant calls for belt-tightening, Conservatives topped the spending charts. Especially their National Caucus Research Office, spending over $12 million. Liberals trailed slightly behind with roughly $10 million. NDP and Bloc? Economically cautious, creatively modest.
Plot twist: fiscal responsibility isnât always fiscally responsible.
Conclusion: A Comedy of Fiscal Errors
Regardless of party colour, each spends like they're auditioning for Canada's Got Expenses. Turns out fiscal responsibility might just be a catchy campaign jingle.
Next up, Chapter 3 promises a thrilling exposé into the mysterious land of contracts and consultants. Who's getting outsourced, for what, and why.
As always, your fiscal friend and comedic accountant,
Sir Looniesworth
Reference:
[1]: House of Commons Proactive Disclosure Reports, Q2 2021 â Q2 2025, accessible here.
© 2025, Sir Looniesworthâs Dept. of Outrageous Honesty
May your budgets balance, and your laughs compound.